Thursday, May 12, 2011

Hospice Care

My dogs both have an auto-immune disease that causes their immune system to attack the soft tissue in their bodies. That being said the soft tissue around the nose, eyes and ears coupled with their paws literally will develop scabs and fall off...picture leprosy if you will. Now before you starts feeling sorry for these pure-bred morons let me assure that in no way shape or form do these two idiots have any idea they are sick. We give them steroids to suppress their immune system so it doesn't attack them as much and other than the fact that they both put on weight easier than me at a donut shop now there really isn't much wrong with them. I can't take them jogging with me anymore since their paws are more sensitive so I had to put them on diet dog food...wow is that gross. You open the bag and when you would normally smell something of meat (unknown from what animal) now you get a giant waft of vegetables...bet that's tasty to a dog. The entire reason that I still call them "dummies" on a daily basis is because even though they are both old as hell and basically living in Hospice Care they will both on occasion do something as if they were puppies. Moose (this one was definitely a puppy mill dog here, we call him cute but slow) will chew up baby girls toys about once a week. And Ty (the older supposed to be smarter of the two) literally barks at anything including me if I change my clothes. At this point I am kind of hoping that he is going blind just so I can stop thinking that he just doesn't put two and two together.

The only part that I even feel semi guilty for is that I call them dummies all the time. Com'on Dummies go outside, upstairs or where ever else I am sending them. So baby girl was walking past them laying in my room the other day scoffed and said "dummies" and kept on walking. You know that you have hit rock bottom even in the animal kingdom when a two year old mocks you. I even tried after that to be nicer and call them things like "the boys" but while bending over for 10 minutes, 15 months pregnant picking of shards of a sand toy that Moose disintegrated...the old Crystal came back and they are rightfully being called dummies again.

No comments: